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Tori's Memo

Page history last edited by Vittoria Veltri 6 years, 2 months ago

 

To:             Jared Grogan

From:        Vittoria Veltri

Date:         January 29, 2015

 

Subject:     Results of Workshop and Peer Feedback for Project One

 

Based on my peer feedback for project one, I will be revising the greeting of my cover letter.   Due to personal evaluation, I will also be editing my webpage to make it more audience oriented.  

 

Workshop Results

The weakness highlighted in my peer feedback for project one was to address my cover letter more specifically and to have a more professional tone in the last paragraph of my cover letter, specifically to omit the word "love".  When discussing my cover letter, my peers liked how I demonstrated knowledge about the company and its accomplishments.  When reviewing my resume, they said they liked the layout and agreed with my choice to highlight my education over my work experience.  Some strengths they noticed when looking over my professional webpage were that it was easy to navigate, professional, and neat.  However, something that I noticed that needs to be fixed on my webpage that was not commented on in my peer feedback is that I need to be more audience oriented especially when it comes to my highlighted work.  I currently have the space that will eventually display the complete projects from this class as "Project 1", "Project 2", and "Project 3".  This is not keeping in mind the people who will be viewing this webpage outside of this class and should be changed.

 

Revision Strategies and Procedures

The biggest concern I believe that needs to be addressed is making my webpage mindful of the different audiences it will be exposed to.  To change this I will rename the projects more specifically.  For example, I will rename "Project 2" to "Wikihow Instructions".  In the same way, I will rename all the projects more specifically.  The next concern I will address is the tone in my last paragraph of my cover letter.  Instead of using the word "love" I will replace it with "be very interested" making the last paragraph sound more professional. The last concern brought up in my peer feedback that I will correct is the greeting of my cover letter.  In order to address my cover letter more clearly I will address it to "The Civil Engineering Department Head / Hiring Manager"

 

Please let me know if you agree with my revisions and if anything else should be edited. 

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