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Conor Brown's Project One Feedback

Page history last edited by Benjamin Puninske 9 years, 5 months ago

Phase One

Poor Initial impression. Not in proper format. Very short. The first sentence doesn't explain any means about "how" you'd contribute.

In your  letter is says "I also have learned some important marketing and business skills that my peers have not been exposed to."  What are these business skills? Where did you learn them?

"I know Quicken likes to hire people who want to live in Detroit, and I’ve already been here for a while." Weak closer, even though they might prefer to hire people from Detroit,  they already know that. They might realize you live there from your information. Maybe should reword that in a not so over the hand manner

 

Covers your skills, tells you were they were cultivated but not in great detail, or persuasively.  Doesn't address any further contact the company. Overall desire to work there seems weak.

 

Phase Two

The idea of the objective is solid. Long term plans and precise goals are expressed. 

 

Skills section seems great in content. The skills listed seem to coincide with the audience's wants. The various programming languages would be essential to catching the interest of a potential employer. Needs better organization overall. There is almost a lack of format; goes from paragraph to  a list without bullet points. The style could be more aesthetically appealing, which could be fixed merely with the formatting. 

 

Experience section has good points. Both experiences listed have coincide with your potential employers needs. Visually appealing but out of format from the rest of your resume. The bullets could be less verbose. 

 

Education is small, as expected. 

 

Phase Three

Make a website!!!

 

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